Today i began to hear that sound we all hate... "beep...beep....beep" my cell phone was dying. After a long day of twitters, text, and phone calls my phone was finished.
I was out shopping for Andrea's Christmas about 45 minutes away from home on the phone with a friend. As I was hearing the subtle tone in my ear telling me the battery power was waining, I kept hoping it would hold on for just a little longer... it didn't. I was in mid-sentence when "boop" it was dead. Suddenly, I found myself feeling something that I can't remember feeling in a really long time... being completely alone. I began to think... what if my car broke down? What if i need to ask Andrea a question?
I felt so disconnected. My powerless cell phone left me feeling powerless. To make matters worse as I was think all these things... I kept having this overwhelming compulsion to twitter (my new obsession) about how I was feeling. I went to grab my phone twice, but... it was dead. Which fueled my feelings even more (I'm convinced I'm crazy).
I was walking into Target, my last stop of the night, with my phone dead in the car. As I walked through the doors I asked myself , "why do I have such a strong connection to and need for my cell phone?" It's obvious why we love our phones...connection to anybody, anywhere, anytime. I sensed God asking me "why don't you feel that way about me?" I answer back "of course I feel that way about you, I need you God... right?? I take you everywhere with me." Then God said, "I'm with you, but do you rely on me?"
I began to think... I know God is with me all the time, but do I really let him lead me, speak to me, guide me, all of the time? I thought of 1 Thessalonians 5:17 that says, "Never stop praying." That to me means that we should live our lives in a constant conversation with God. It means leaving that channel of communication always open, always waiting and listening, always tuned in to the "still small voice".
On the days that I don't "connect" with God in a prayer time with just me and Him do I feel as "disconnected" as I do without my cell phone companion? for a few hours? ...no!
That means I'm living my life in a pattern un-reliant on Christ like I should. This has got to change! I should be desperate for His direction and lost without it. I've got to enter a place with God where he is in total control.
God, I promise and pledge to honor you by relying on you and not on myself. May I long to be continuously connected to you, as you long to connect with me. Lead me, guide me, speak to me... you've got my attention. Thank you for reminding me how powerless I am without you through my powerless cell phone.
0 comments:
Post a Comment